Dear Lib Dem Mum,
I am finding the leadership election very stressful. I am an Ed supporter, but my son is completely for Layla and my partner dislikes both and is disillusioned by the whole proceeding. My local party and my friends groups are similarly split, and there is so much partiality and fractiousness and bitchiness it hurts my heart. I cannot see the saviour of liberalism that my son sees in Layla, and I can’t fathom why he doesn’t understand that Ed represents the continuity and safety that we need.
It seems to be going on forever, and each day brings more arguments and things for people to be partisan about. I see people who have been friends for years falling out over this, and I worry that it will cause irreparable damage to both personal relationships and the fabric of the party. What can I do to stop this happening?
Help?
Anxious, Hampshire
Dear Anxious,
I think a lot of people will be in the same boat as you right now. Leadership elections always expose differences in perspective, and this one is no different. It’s a turning point for the party, as every leadership election tends to be, and we all have our own ideas as to what the best future direction is and what our party’s priorities ought to be.
My advice to you would be to always bear in mind that while this election has highlighted the differences between you and the friends, family members and party colleagues that you care about, those people are still fundamentally those same people you care about. People who share your life and hopes and goals. People who you have more in common with than differences with. You might differ on the best way to get to the future, but you all agree on a future that is worth working towards, and you all have good intentions as to how to get there.
Remember that we are all part of the beautiful, diverse, rich Lib Dem family. Remember that will not change no matter how long the leadership election goes on or whoever wins. Remember that we are all still the people we were before this leadership election started, and we will all still campaign together and do our best to make the party and the country a better place once it is done.
Have hope, it’ll be over soon.
Love always,
Lib Dem Mum
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14 Comments
Anxious. It is the talk of continuity that has many people alarmed. Do we continue to poll at 6% and accept it? Do we continue to be ignored by the media? Whoever does not win will still have massive influence on the partys future direction.The membership will come together afterwards. Energy and direction are now the essential ingredients.
What a nice idea. The party certainly needs a wise, caring “agony aunt” right now
Tim, dear, I do think that you are displaying a little bit of the partiality that is making Anxious so anxious. Just a little.
Catherine, thank you dear, I shall do my best 💞
Better than the Invisible man leadership
“Lib Dem Mum”? “Agony aunt”?
Sounds like institutional sexism to me, but perhaps I’ve just read too many outraged posts on LDV recently! 😉
‘“Lib Dem Mum”? “Agony aunt”? Sounds like institutional sexism to me,’
Perhaps, but it reminds me of an Alan Whicker item for Nationwide (?) half a century ago when he interviewed a a number of ‘Dear Marje’ s and ‘Aunt Agatha’ s and one was revealed as a balding middle-aged man with horn-rimmed spectacles.
We joined the Party because it is the best (but not necessarily a perfect) fit with our individual philosophies. Although the media like to portray a party as a monarchy, it uses the contributions of many members working together. After the leadership election, we will still have to work supporting each other and the leadership.
I would turn to Charles Kennedy, remembering his conference speech upon being elected by AV from a field of 5 : ‘I thank all of you who voted for me, whether as First Preference, Second Preference, Third……’ (Laughter and Applause)
Shelagh: I would always advocate kindness, even to the leadership. And possibly a nice cup of tea.
Peter: I might gently contend, dear, that it’s just as sexist to deny women traditional roles as to force us into them. The key here, as liberals, is to look to freedom and making sure nobody is enslaved by conformity, and that everyone has the best chances to make the choices they want to make.
Ian: I won’t be drawn into speculation about my physical attributes, except to say that you might be right about the glasses, dear.
Thank you all for engaging with my little column 💞
We need an interesting leader to spark curiosity in the electorate.
“We need an interesting leader to spark curiosity in the electorate.”
Lib Dem Mum for leader?
Dear Lib Dem Mum
Do you think either Layla or Ed will introduce maternity leave for our candidates as some of us have fought for 17 years?
Impatient
(also of Hampshire)
Ruth
Might be nice to have any sort of remuneration for candidates!
Ruth, you’d have to ask them, dear. Sorry. I would hope that parental leave of all kinds is something that they would at least consider?
Tim13 – exactly right but I was actually talking about leave rather than pay in this instance.
Lib Dem Mum -Over the years I have asked numerous leadership candidates about this issue and after nearly two decades one does tend to tire of the: “Thank you for raising this important issue…” type of answers but with no solutions!!