Not a question I’ve heard, but I got your attention!
The way we view men and women is still fundamentally flawed. I imagine our Lib Dem male MPs have several suits they use in cycle, only having to choose a shirt and tie.
But our women MPs? It’s a different matter, though it shouldn’t be. I imagine hair, makeup, matching shoes, accessories and the right outfit for the right occasion are all things our women MPs think about. Why??
As a prospective parliamentary candidate, one of the women-only training sessions I attended was on image. I remember the look on a fellow participant’s face as we were given guidance on what to wear and not to wear. She was aghast, having been a successful business person for years and finding the advice given outdated.
This week is Eating Disorders Awareness Week. And what is a factor in some eating disorders? Body image. There is much pressure in society to look a certain way, be a particular shape. We are taught first impressions are visual more than auditory – that how we look trumps what we say. I accept that’s what research proves, but I’m fighting a society that expects me to look a certain way before they listen to what I have to say.
Eating disorders are complex and the myth of body image is actually just one factor, and not always a factor. Eating disorders are often coping mechanisms and/or ways of being in control of at least one aspect of your life.
A whole range of different factors combine, including genetic, psychological, environmental, social and biological influences.
Eating disorders affect everyone:
While young women are most likely to develop an eating disorder, particularly those aged 12 to 20, anyone can develop an eating disorder, regardless of their age, gender, or ethnic or cultural background. It is thought that around a quarter of sufferers are male.
I have a friend whose daughter was hospitalised with an eating disorder. I have seen first-hand the effect on learning, health and the wider family. Eating disorders are not easy to tackle, and need expert help and early intervention. It is why I am backing Beat’s campaign this week for better provision. Here is a link to the petition calling on the government to introduce waiting times for adults with eating disorders.
Tonight, from 6-7pm, Beat is running a Twitter live chat with the team at NICE using #EDchat.
And back to my opening about MPs dress tutoring – my own view is that we should be encouraged to dress the way that represents who we are. It might be jumper and jeans or skinny leather and piercings. Shouldn’t our representatives look like the general population? Personally, I favour trousers and cardigans.
Aren’t we as Lib Dems for the individual? Letting people be themselves takes away the fake nonsense of pretence, grows self-esteem, and creates a healthier society.
* Kirsten Johnson was the PPC for Oxford East in the 2017 General Election. She is a pianist and composer at www.kirstenjohnsonpiano.com.
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10 Comments
Nothing put me off the idea of being an MP faster than those training sessions… Which I suspect may lead some in the party to think they are having the desired effect LOL
Totally with you on this one Kirsten. Depressing that when we’re supposed to be representing diversity we’re pressured to conform. I’m sure it’s worse for women but it’s been suggested to me I should dress differently. I don’t think this is a minor issue – it represents a falsity which undermines a politician’s ability to be a genuine person.
My cohort was advised not to have a bob haircut as it was unflattering. Basically, “Come along girls let’s grow out those tresses in time for the General Election”. Also that younger candidates should “accessorize” to make themselves look older. Did anyone ever independently evaluate this training or point out that it sounded like “Women and Home” magazine circa 1954?
I’m a tad bemused.
Outside the odd workplace and the military, nobody is forcing anybody to dress in any particular way, society certainly isn’t. Take any random 100 people and you will probably have 100 people dressed differently. Isn’t it time we stopped looking for somebody to blame for everything that happens, and accept some personal responsibility for our own decision making.
Sometimes these issues go way back, and can never be truly healed. My wife has just supported her 32 year old goddaughter who was hours from death from anorexia and who had previously self harmed on a 6 month journey back to moderate health at the nearest dedicated facility in Darlington, to her home in Barrow in Furness which is 100 miles away, I think the next nearest was Glasgow over 200 miles away, that is the reality of the national provision for eating disorders.
My wife was completely unaware of the situation she was living under at home, and was mortified when she found out , and it took weeks of gentle support by phone and text for her to agree to see my wife, after which she visited everyday, in all that time she refused to see either of her parents. Her issues were not about body image per se, she just wanted to die, and starving herself to death in her mind was the option she thought she could control, and it was all the result of her middle class professional parents using her and her siblings from the age of 12 as a weapon in their two decades of vindictiveness towards each other.
Barnaby, thank you for sharing this real-life example of how horrific an eating disorder can be. It is truly wonderful that your wife is able to support her goddaughter in this way. The lack of provision close to where people live is a real problem with eating disorders services and mental health services more generally.
I think if you expect male MPs to wear suits, as you seem to, then women should wear the equivalent, otherwise they won’t be taken as seriously as the men. Yes, it’s unfortunate that as humans we judge by looks before anyone opens their mouth but women at the moment do have to do what they can to neutralise this hidden bias, especially when they are in a minority in a minority political party.
Attitudes to acceptable dress change slowly, for men as well as for women. I have watched in Westminster as Tony Greaves broke the code that peers should wear suits in the Lords by turning up in jacket and trousers, and more recently Paul Scriven not only coming in without a tie on but even making speeches like that (initial noisy disapproval from some Conservatives, but now accepted). When you are a candidate, you have to be carefully conscious about the first impressions you make on the people you meet; so attention to that in candidate training is sensible. But that shouldn’t stop us from stretching the limits of ‘acceptable’ dress.
I remember being told at an Image session about 25 years ago that my hair was too long and my skirt too short. Both probably still true!
Barnaby
Most “dress codes” (I have always hated this term as it implies conformity) are enforced informally these days. I am pleased that over the last 7 years as a Town Councillor I have gradually by example drawn people to a more informal style of dress within meetings. Having been elected this week to District Council in the most unusual snowy by-election I have ever known, I shall no doubt turn my attention to them, where there is said to be quite a strong almost formal dress code!
The other point I would make is that it is, and always has been, MUCH worse for men than women. I appreciate that women have had problems in the past with “no trousers” policies – largely, I would hope gone now, but men, although again some strictness of the formal has gone, the informal remains strong.
It is interesting, Kirsten, that you acknowledge that in your introduction , that you “imagine our Lib Dem male MPs have several suits they wear in cycle”, in other words you believe that a suit is the normal (and proper?) dress for an MP. Interesting the case of Tony Greaves also brought up!
I know from being a school governor that the “must have school uniform” culture is alive and well – we have had a couple of discussions where I have been in a minority of one in wanting them abandoned.
On the issue of “image”, what goes with what, complexion hair etc, I have in the past attended one of the party’s sessions when I was a PPC. I found it interesting, but I doubt whether I took much in the way of learning from it! And, of course, I think that sort of thing is probably imposed, even now, on women. Time for change!
Just to clarify, I am not endorsing the suit at the must go to outfit for men, just that it seems to be the accepted norm in many contexts, including in Parliament. I’m in favour of men dressing as they see fit, and not conforming.
The article was meant to raise awareness of Eating Disorders Awareness Week. Interesting that most of the comments are on image, showing it is an issue that people have had to wrestle with.