There was further embarrassment for the party this morning as it emerged that a vast majority of grassroots attendees had taken seriously the “evidence” of this picture of Oscar-winning actress Kate Winslet in the conference brochure:
Over seven of the nine people quizzed by Lib Dem Voice’s roving reporters on Saturday morning in the exhibition hall at the Harrogate Conference Centre had taken the picture at face value, and assumed that Winslet had attended the Lib Dem Council Awards event held by the party every year.
“I must say I was tickled pink to learn from this picture that she’s a supporter,” said Richard Twoflower, 54, a member from West Sale and Urmston local party, “Winslet is a very popular actress following her recent Oscar win and it’s great to see her associated with the party like this. Hopefully we can now piggy-back on her success.”
Hetty Vimes, 42, vice-chair of Morchard Bishop and Mid Devon local party, agreed: “Kate is a fabulous English star and I’m just so pleased she took time out to attend the Lib Dem Local Government Awards. Who’d have thought it?”
Asked how she thought it was possible for Winslet to have been photographed at awards that had yet to happen when the brochure went to press, Hetty replied, “Well, they can do awfully clever things with computers now, can’t they. I don’t think that’s any reason to doubt the veracity of the picture.”
Others were more puzzled about the picture’s origins. Colin Ridcully of Surrey Forest, 39, pondered, “I wonder where they got the red carpet from? I’ve certainly never seen anyone in a floor-length evening gown walking along a red carpet at a Lib Dem conference before!” But he conceded that “perhaps I’ve just been going to the wrong fringe events. The camera never lies, after all.”
In actual fact, party officials had doctored the picture to show apparently Lib Dem banners behind a genuine picture of Winslet at the recent Golden Globe Awards, in a shocking new technique known as “photochopping”.
Tom Vetinari, one of the bright young things (27) at the party’s press office, defended the technique: “I think it’s great for us to be at the technological cutting edge. We really fooled everyone with this caper! And of course, we knew we could rely on the press to get the message out. Originally only about a thousand people – mostly members – who received the brochure as part of their conference packs would have seen our mocked-up Winslet picture. Now, thanks to the Mail’s and Independent’s coverage, hundreds of thousands have seen it!”
He did however concede one flaw in the party’s plan – “We shouldn’t have used the tagline ‘Winning can be emotional’ under the picture. I now realise that people might have looked at that and thought we were making a humorous play on the fact that Winslet made an emotional speech at the Golden Globes, and using it as an ironic teaser for our own far-less-glamorous event. Still, I think we got away with it!”
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At one Conference we advertised the Liberal Revue under the slogan: “Mrs Thatcher offers a song, a dance and a theory of sound money.”
Someone bought a ticket, only to come back later and ask for a refund because he had found out that Mrs Thatcher wasn’t really appearing.
nine people does not a sample make
I heard she got wrapped up in a fringe meeting on site value rating and didn’t make it to the awards in the end
What a bunch of morons! No wonder you’re stuck at 14% in the polls.
I spoke to my old friend James Weatherwax about this too, he was completely taken in.
Amazingly gullible, some of these people.
Here’s one we prepared earlier. Ms Kate Winslet told LOL that “one” MP missed Gaza debate with sore head. We told her that she’d need to multiply by at least 20 to get to the truth.
Sigh. Sometimes I think some party members just aren’t on the same planet as the rest of us. They probably think the world is flat, too.
So far that’s Labour troll 1 – Tory troll a resounding nil.
Come on, Daily Fail, bite, bite!
“nine people does not a sample make” – I think it’s more a case of “nine people does a satire make”
I couldn’t believe it when I saw the piece in The Indy. . . . nearly choked on my muesli
I understand Lord Bonkers will be submitting a written question in the Upper House. He had naturally believed that Ms Winslet was the prize and had been lobbying hard for Rutland South West District Council to be given the top award, so that he could take her home and feed her to the Rutland Water Monster.
Flat like the Discworld Adam?
What would Pratchett make of this? Interesting Times with all the web Sorcery!
Her Majesty’s Press have blatantly failed to uphold their exacting investigative standards! Where are the two infallible signifiers of Liberalism?
I suppose there is the possibility that she may be wearing sandals beneath her frock, but can you see her beard? I rest my case!
Does she have a postal vote?
I don’t suppose somebody can actually tell us the results of the awards can they?
Loved the article. Such satire.
94% of LDV readers CAN be taken in!
Only when I got to Surrey Forest did I realise that something did not compute!
But seriosuly folks -
it doesn’t half make us look like a bunch of amateurs.
Isn’t there anyone with the savvy to realize you can’t just use people’s photos like this – it make one despair!
Who is Kate Winslet and why should I care?