One of the things that struck me the most about the response surrounding the case of Sarah Everard was that on Twitter the phrase “not all men” has been trending alongside her name. It has become a common pattern that as soon as women talk about their experiences that they are met with some form of reply such as “but not all men are like this” and “men can be victims as well”.
While both statements are true, it ignores the fundamental point that abuse happens when someone in a position of power takes advantage of their own power at the expense of the victim. So, although there are male victims (which for the record whose cases should be taken very seriously) and while not every single man is a predator, there is an overwhelming pattern of men being perpetrators and women being victims. This is because in society, men still hold most of the power; whether that be in upper body strength (which on average overpowers a woman’s) or much more crucially in the societal privilege that men have held over women for centuries.
This leads to the fact that 97% of women between the ages of 18-24 (according to a study reported by the Guardian) have reported experiencing sexual harassment. Herein, my problem with the “not all men” sentiment lies. If not all men are predatory, then why have (virtually) all women experienced predatory behaviour? This is a conundrum.
Speaking from personal experience, I was fifteen and in school uniform when I was first felt up by a man sitting next to me on public transport and younger than that when I was first catcalled. Those were not the last times such incidents have happened and as a twenty-year old I have now lost count. These experiences are far from unique, they are (a relatively mild) reality of a woman’s experience. It is these accumulated experiences that make every woman consider their personal safety most times they leave their home. Sarah Everard would have made these same considerations.
When I first heard about Sarah, it felt like I had swallowed a very bitter pill. Immediately it was because of how heartbroken I was for Sarah and her loved ones, but the aftertaste was the reality that that could have been me (or any woman). I myself grew up in South London not far from where Sarah was, and have friends that live in that area. It is considered pretty safe. So, then she was walking in a pretty safe area on main roads, before 10pm, wearing bright colours, on the phone to her boyfriend. Yet Sarah Everard was still was not safe.
If women get taxis, they have creepy – and sometimes worse – encounters with taxi drivers. If women take a walk in broad daylight, they are assaulted. If women have the audacity to go to work, they are still assaulted. Despite everything we do, as women by default, our safety is always in question. That is without throwing in other factors such as class (which means that women have to face this behaviour in less safe areas and are more likely to work later hours) or race (which exposes them to the chance of hate crimes therefore increasing risk of attack).
Men are now asking what they can do for women’s safety. That in itself is encouraging as the first step is listening to women. There are simple tips such as keeping distance if you find yourself walking behind a woman late at night or offering at night to walk with your female friends. The bigger solution however (and the solution to my earlier conundrum) lies in complicity.
While not all men are predators, it is complicity that allows that minority of men to violate the overwhelming majority of women. It is simply a fallacy that all women will experience predatory behaviour but no man has come across another man that has exhibited such behaviour. There will be men that exhibit inappropriate behaviour towards women that you know. They will exist in your social circle, at your work, in our party and in politics. If you are a man, have you always called out when a friend or colleague that has said something/behaved somewhat inappropriately or acted when you have seen a woman look uncomfortable in a public space?
Acts of extreme violence (such as the tragic case of Sarah Everard) do not appear out the blue. They are the direct product of a culture that enables predatory behaviour; that tells a woman that the guy that won’t leave her alone at a pub is “just drunk but harmless” or asks her to ignore an unwanted hand because “he’s of that generation”. It allows the behaviour of men to be brushed under the rug because even if they were “inappropriate”, they were not deemed illegal.
This will never change until as a society we shift our focus onto inappropriate behaviour and the complicity that facilitates it. We cannot do this if we continue to absolve the discomfort men may feel by still entertaining cries of “not all men”. We all need to step up to these conversations. We owe it to Sarah Everard and all other victims, past and future.
* Maddy Planche is a Lib Dem member and student in Edinburgh
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And differentiating between men who may harass me, and men who won’t is tricky to do before they’ve actually harassed me, and then I get blamed for letting them do it. No wonder I don’t trust.
(P.S. I’m in a wheelchair or on crutches, wearing baggy clothes to deal with my pain condition, and that doesn’t stop the harassment … if anything it makes it worse because I can’t get away from it so I become an easy target.)
A brave and thought provoking piece – thank you for writing it. As a man I think it can be easy to blame a “minority” of men, and leave it there, and overlook the role that the “majority” can play in helping stop every day migroaggressions and aggressions.
“If women get taxis, they have creepy – and sometimes worse – encounters with taxi drivers. If women take a walk in broad daylight, they are assaulted. If women have the audacity to go to work, they are still assaulted”
Please don’t make out as if this is the norm or anything like it, because it isn’t.
“If you are a man, have you always called out when a friend or colleague that has said something/behaved somewhat inappropriately or acted when you have seen a woman look uncomfortable in a public space? ”
And if you are a man and have not called out when observing such incidents – then why not? Is there an implication of tacit acceptance on your part of such harrassment if/when done by your male friends and/or colleagues?
Nonconformistradical – humour for me died last year. Levity is gone.
What do you want? Male lockdowns? Given we’ve normalised tyranny why not? I can see it coming now – if we’re not using mass house arrest we’re not taking it seriously. But hey, all the born yesterday liberals think slippery slopes are all a-ok right?
As the father of four daughters, (one of whom lives in south London, another, like Maddy, went to Edinburgh University), I too am heartbroken for Sarah, her family and her friends. There but for the grace of ……….
Maddy writes, “If women get taxis, they have creepy, and sometimes worse, encounters with taxi drivers”.
On I hope a helpful practical point, all taxis and PHV are licensed in Scotland and in England & Wales via local authorities. I attach below links containing references to public safety and safeguarding – and the powers and duties of local authorities (i.e. Councillors) to enforce them.
1. Taxi And Private Hire Car Licensing – The Scottish Governmentwww.gov.scot › documents › govscot:documentPDF
2. Taxi and PHV licensing – Local Government Associationwww.local.gov.uk › default › files › documents PDF Taxi and PHV licensing in England and Wales is undertaken by licensing authorities (district and unitary councils), which have the responsibility for ensuring the public travel in safety…….
Maddy, and all of us, shouldn’t hesitate to identify (vehicles have numbers) and lodge a complaint about the type of behaviour mentioned. Local Councillors shouldn’t hesitate to take enforcement action. Universities (like Edinburgh) shouldn’t hesitate to give support and information to those for whom they have a duty of care.
As to the police, they must (and I think will) review their recruit profiling.
6 comments so far & only one by a Woman. And I have just made it 7.
#notallmen has only been trending because people keep tweeting to say how awful it is that it’s trending.
What’s happened to Ms Everard is absolutely awful and I can understand how she in particular is so relatable to many women. I also don’t want to take away anything from those sharing their own experiences online.
However, to be honest I’ve been pretty appalled by how her murder seems to have been hijacked by certain groups wishing to make a feminist point – the reclaim the streets vigil barely mentioned her in its press release. She seems to have become a secondary character in her own murder, which is the saddest thing. Shaun Bailey was rightfully criticised for politicising the murder, but many of those who did that have done exactly the same thing.
This piece is thought-provoking and reasonably balanced, even if some of the points you raise are ones I’ve found quite frustrating in how they’ve been presented online – not because they aren’t accurate, but because they’ve been presented so simplistically and in such an exaggerated way, which I don’t think is helpful.
The men on twitter asking what they can do for women’s safety I find fairly infantilising in all honesty – it’s basic decency and common sense that they should be (and probably are) doing already. If some of these men believe that their mere presence puts fear into women, they quite frankly need to take a look at themselves. The perception given by some is that women are constantly in a state of danger and all men are to be feared; as if being abducted and murdered by a stranger is an everyday risk for women in the UK. There are lots of women tweeting things like ‘we know it’s not all men, but we don’t know which ones it is, so we have to treat them all as a danger’ – if you replaced men with ‘muslims’ or ‘black people’, you can see how ridiculous that statement is.
It hasn’t really been helped by an apparently sarcastic but still stupid comment in the House of Lords about a curfew for men instead of women being told to stay at home, which wasn’t even based on something the police actually said.
It doesn’t have to be all men. As long as a significant minority are bullies, and not stopped, then women will be in fear of them. One never knows.
It’s like cars v vulnerable road users. Most car drivers are well behaved, obey the Highway Code etc. But a significant minority exceed speed limits, and generally drive dangerously for others. That’s enough to keep people scared.
I think it’s appalling that it’s the Met police stopping the vigil, seeing as they failed to stop one of their officers murdering a woman. One law for us, one for everyone else?
We don’t know much about the circumstances of Sarah’s disappearance and probable murder yet, so let’s not get ahead of ourselves. There are two people ‘helping the police with their enquiries’. One male and one female.
At the risk of being called old fashioned can I just point out that neither have been convicted of any offence and there used to be a principle of ‘innocent until proven guilty’. Now we have trial by media which means it is ultra difficult in high profile cases to find a truly impartial jury.
LDV readers might have seen the recent Channel 5 documentary on Luke Mitchell. The evidence for his conviction for the 2003 murder of Jodi Jones was flimsy in the extreme. Yet the jury convicted him. No-one who has studied the evidence can say there wasn’t reasonable doubt. He’d already been found guilty in the Scottish press so they were reluctant to disagree. We had a similar occurrence in England with the trial of Colin Stagg for the murder of Rachell Nickell in 1992. It was a horrendous case. There was no real evidence against him but he’d already been tried and found guilty in the press. Someone had to pay.
But the Judge in the case, and to his credit, threw it out for lack of evidence. Many wouldn’t have. We can’t know what a jury would have decided but we can have a good idea based on previous experience. It later emerged that the murder was committed by someone else entirely.
Alexander
With respect though does the fact that she stood in Parliament and said it not deeply trouble you? Does the fact that it even crossed her lips not speak to a tyrannical mindset that is rapidly developing?
If a Conservative said that there should be a Muslim curfew would you be so sanguine?
So, 13 comments so far of which 3 are by Women. Perhaps there is a case for closing this thread to everyone not identifying as a Woman ?
The remark about “Curfews for Men ” seems to have been misunderstood, the point was that many Women already feel that they are under Curfew Now & that is unacceptable yet accepted.
“So, 13 comments so far of which 3 are by Women”
One of them has already, without any need for a judge and jury, already convicted the male suspect with her comment of “they failed to stop one of their officers murdering a woman.”
Maybe he did. Maybe he even self identifies as woman. I agree it is unlikely but we just don’t know at the moment.
Can we at least try to keep an open mind in case we are called upon to do jury service?
@ Maddy Planche,
I can’t tell you how upsetting it is as a so called second wave feminist, that my granddaughters face the same experiences that we experienced in the 60’s. Thanks in part to the ‘whataboutery’ that seems as deeply ingrained in so called Liberal men as in the general population.
As someone who has worked in other cultures, there seems to be a willingness to criticise aspects of those cultures, but continue to have a blind spot about our our culture and its consequences for women.
@ Alexander,
I feel physically sick knowing what the parents and relatives are going through, but some cases act as a catalyst for change, and as far as I am concerned change is needed , or have the sickening number of women who suffer violence or death at the hands of men passed you by unnoticed?
One thing I do know , is as a parent, I would want others to do everything in their power to stop others having to go through such unimaginable pain and suffering. Theirs is too awful to contemplate and no words or actions can alter that.
That Alexander is my feminist point.
It appears that the proportion of female murder victims in the UK ranges between a quarter and a third in any given year. Every murder is terrible but men being murdered by other men is actually more common that women being murdered by men.
“without any need for a judge and jury, already convicted the male suspect”
My comment is directed at the institutional racism and misogyny of the Met. Yes, indeed, the suspect may be innocent, and also innocent of the alleged previious exposure offence. If called upon for jury service I will ofc consider the evidence presented in court.
@ Brad,
What are you saying about men?
@ Jenny Barnes,
The two offences should be treated separately. It’s possible he’s guilty of one but not the other.
One possible , and I stress ‘possible’, scenario is that Ms Everard was killed in a road accident on her way home and the suspect tried to cover it up. So this would mean he was guilty of a lesser offense than murder. So you shouldn’t jump to public conclusions until you know the full facts. Regardless of whether you’re likely to be on the jury.
Didn’t want to upset Paul Barker, you know, being a bloke and all that, so I asked my other half what she made of all this. She said that although the murder of Sarah Everard was simply dreadful, she feared it had been high jacked by the usual suspects who will attach themselves to the cause de jour. I see a group of men were fighting the police on Clapham Common this evening. Men and violence. Women, policemen, supporters of another teams, they’re not that bothered.
We need a broader discussion of violence. The streets weren’t safe 50 years ago. They aren’t safe for men, we won’t get raped, just knifed. And it’s not about “power dynamics”, it’s about bad people doing bad things.
This isn’t aimed at you Maddy, but I thought it’s something worth reading.
https://www.spiked-online.com/2021/03/13/this-is-not-what-sarah-would-have-wanted/
“When I first heard of the vigil for Sarah on Clapham Common I was looking forward to attending – it felt good to be able to ‘do something’ and express my love for Sarah and my sorrow for what has happened to her. Less than a day later, I decided not to attend, as have many of her friends. I can’t speak for all of them, but my reason for not attending is this: my friend’s tragic death has been hijacked. It is not a tribute to her any more, it’s about something else – and I don’t like what it has become.”
—
Unfortunately, due to the pretty appalling actions of the police in handling the event (watching some of the livestream, which The Independent should be disgusted with themselves for running, it couldn’t really be described as a ‘vigil’ by the evening, even if it had been been earlier in the day), the focus is going to be on that now as well.
Chris Cory of course it is about power dynamics. When I was 19 or 20 I was on the top deck of a London bus and the youths behind me were cheerfully discussing whether they were going to “break me in” or not. They were younger than my little brother but I had to assess whether they were serious or not and how I was going to get down the stairs and would they follow me etc etc.
Same part of South London quarter of a century later guy shouts at me: “Put that newspaper down sexy lady Why aren’t you at home with my mother f***ing children wiping their mother f**king faces etc etc. Had to ask for help from two complete strangers.
And all the incidents in that intervening quarter century. Just for being female.
We are ruled by Etonians men etc, who feel the rite to be supreme and consider others as 2nd class people (that includes women).To maintain this position as they are the elite in charge change in societies rules of behaviour are not conducive to their way of belief .Result that the education system does not teach value and respect of others ( and women).A campaign should be launched toallow teaching children to respect others and human values and women.The aim to value others in humanity terms.This could go a long way to alleviate hate etc and ‘looking down’ on others.
Alexander
Yes. And apparently the Coronavirus Act will be extended for six more months. And the country’s foremost liberal party again has nothing to say about the total abolition of liberty.
That would take it to the end of furlough. Almost like another six months’ house arrest is on the cards.
It’s only three weeks to flatten the curve.
@nigel hunter
“A campaign should be launched toallow teaching children to respect others and human values and women.The aim to value others in humanity terms.This could go a long way to alleviate hate etc and ‘looking down’ on others.”
Seconded
All I can say is, I am very unhappy by the damage to society during the last year.
I think as a woman, I will stand back if I feel threatened or afraid. Being disabled, can make you feel vulnerable.
Mental Health is an issue today, with advice being given in lockdown, go home, the advice is being given over and over again. Protect the NHS. Many older people have had little social interaction, for months.
With this confinement month after month, problems become larger.
I think some honesty on the true figures would be a start, get society moving, it will be month’s before any true progress.
The Labour Party have gone from saying they’ll abstain early this morning to saying they’ll vote against slightly later this morning. Nothing like a sudden anti-policing backlash to capitalise on, but at least they’ve got there…
The source of the article of the Guardian article is the APPG:
https://www.unwomenuk.org/site/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/APPG-UN-Women_Sexual-Harassment-Report_2021.pdf
The Yougov poll article cited is:
https://yougov.co.uk/topics/relationships/articles-reports/2021/03/08/eurotrack-two-thirds-women-sweden-and-half-britain
Data:
https://docs.cdn.yougov.com/qepiqi9xaf/YouGov%20Sexual%20harassment.pdf
Helen, agree with mental health issues, as I just be diagnosed anxiety and stress related issues after a year of hell. As for this case, the education of men in regards to treating others with respect is a way forward. If you criminalise every man or brand them as a potential rapist etc and ban them from outside at 6pm onwards only provokes a more hostile reaction. Here is little acknowledgement how things have drastically changed in twenty years, when women were treated poorly etc, such as cat calls etc etc… Movement and progress is slow… To try and move it faster good… To provoke and treat a significantly large proportion of the population as a would be attacker etc… Is not the way to go forwards
What happened is abhorrent, but I do not think it is right or helpful to categorise men as being complacent in these behaviours towards women.
1 in 6 males have experienced sexual abuse or assault, whether in childhood or as adults. It just goes far less reported in men.
I have witnessed and been subjected to many violent crimes myself over the years by both men and women.
I was abused as a child by a male member of family,
I was also having a sexual relationship at the age of 12 with a 28 year old woman (though i did not see that as abuse at the time)
I used to run a Gay nightclub and have had other gay men grab my crotch without being invited or encouraged as though that was acceptable because of my job and being gay.
I have endured numerous homophobic attacks through my work through the years, one very serious that left my partner hospitalised .
As awful as it is say, “some” gay women and I have observed this in many gay scenes throughout the world, behave with a pack hierarchy mentality and will attack a “newcomer” to the scene to put them in their place ( all gay scenes will have a dominant lesbian group who behave badly)
Ask any male stripper and they will tell you that women behave appallingly at ladies nights and they have been subjected to being scratched, bitten and grabbed and they will tell you that they much prefer to work the gay scene where they are not subjected to such violence.
My point is, some people are just plain bad, dysfunctional and have domineering and predatory tendencies , no matter their sex, orientation or creed.
Not all men are complacent in violence towards women
Just as not all straight people are complacent towards homophobia
Or white people are complacent towards racism
Or Muslims are complacent towards terrorism.
I dont think any of this is helpful and aids us in addressing the problems of these violent crimes and attitudes.
I think I know how the post war German generation felt now. They were still associated with everything that had happened previously even though it had nothing to do with them. They weren’t even born at the time.
It didn’t matter how much they tried to explain that and how much they disagreed with, and were sorry for, what had happened. They were still German.
matt
Your argument comes from the wrong direction. The fact that men have been victims of crimes is not the most important point. I appreciate that all the articles are making a claim that women are uniquely victims of violence which is odd when they represent a minority of victims of violence in general when they are the majorities in certain categories.
However the more useful point when looking at responding to crimes is that the number of perpetrators tends to be very small in % terms but able to do vast damage in terms of victimising.
Any policy targeting a majority to address a tiny minority is inefficient and often counter productive. I agree with your comparison to Muslims as those doing this would normally see it if that was the example they were looking at.
A quick list of actions that are “sexual harassment” in research are:
-Winked at you
-Looked at your breasts
-Asked you out for a drink
-Commented on your attractiveness directly to you
-Directed a sexual joke at you
-Wolf whistled at you
-Requested sexual favours from you
-Placed their hand on your lower back
-Danced by pressing themselves against you in a club
-Pinched or grabbed your bum
-Exposed their genitalia to you (i.e. flashing)
-Tried to take a photo up your skirt
The issue is that the discussion is held in very imprecise language, and the research notes that many of the categories which are often used don’t lend themselves to a response by anyone. Presumably everyone is keen to reduce up-skirting, flashing and groping. Is looking, winking and being asked out a big concern that needs everyone mobilised against it? Stopping the flashers is looking for the minority, stopping those who ask people out for a drink starts to look a bit different. You will also see in the detail of research that the many of women would not want actions on areas others consider to require it (81% don’t consider comments about attractiveness to be harassment, 61% hand on lower back, 47% looking at breasts, 94% asking out for a drink).
Chris Cory — if a man threatens another man – or a woman – with violence of any kind it is about power dynamics. Men are also at risk from male violence, but when it comes to sexual violence it is women who are particularly at risk.
‘Bad behaviour’ is about power (and most particularly when we are considering abduction — how can it not be?). It’s about power to break the rules, to ignore the rules, or impose your own rules on those you consider weaker, to challenge those you see as deserving of having their status attacked, cementing your own place in the pecking order.
And all this is about the fact that men – not all men, but most men – are still complacement with aspects of our upbringing — participated in by women as well as men — that allow and permit us to express and use our physicality and strength and anger as part of our selves, turning a mild physical advantage into a form of power.
Here in South Bristol I walk the streets and lanes and parks alone at night and feel fairly safe (apart from the occasional flocking of – male – bored, aggressive teenagers in the summer months). I do not know many women or men of BME background who would do the same. I have slept – whilst ‘worse for wear’ on a park bench c200yds from the scene of a rape crime. This gives me power many women don’t feel they have, I’m afraid.
I think we are better to look at some of the root causes of violent crime and the part that society plays in this and in which some people would wish to deny any responsibility.
Drugs is a major cause of violent crime and Murder on our streets.
From territorial gang warfare on the supply and control of drugs,
The psychological effects on lower ranking gang members who come under intense bullying and abuse from higher ranking gang members ( This surly would play a part in the psychology of a person who ends up feeling inferior and feels the need to display his dominance towards weaker innocence members of society)
There are plenty of middle class recreational drug users who refuse to accept the part that they play in the scourge that drugs causes on our streets and accounts for the vast majority of violent crimes and murders on our streets.
What has happened to Sarah Everard is awful and whilst drug related crimes has not been a factor in this, we cannot discount the part that it plays in other cases of violent and sexual crimes committed against both women and men.
My point is you cannot simply lay the blame at all “men” for this when there are wider societal problems which simply cannot be ignored and brushed under the table
I apologise if my comments on various threads on this issue comes across as downplaying the fear that women go through, please believe me, I am not.
I am just trying to get the point across that this is not, in my opinion just a gender issue.
Take upskirting for instance, it is truly abhorrent, it is not just women experiencing this.
Urinal Spy is an ever increasing problem, the Internet is full of videos containing it.
Unsuspecting males being videoed in pubs, clubs, airports any public restrooms being videoed against their knowledge and having it uploaded ( along with their face) to the Internet, it is truly abhorrent and would cause a lot of distress to the person were they to find out they are sprawled across many porn sites without their consent and the ordeal they have to go through to try and get it removed.
To have people hiding in a toilet, filming you whilst you’re at a urinal, or standing next to you at a urinal pretending to be texting, whilst secretly filming you is disgusting to sale the least. It just isn’t getting talked about as much.
I really am not trying to take anything away from women, I am just trying to say that we have a wider problem that is equally affecting both Genders and if we chose to ignore that, then we will not have any chance in solving some of the problems
matt, you make several valid points, but as men, we need to take back the power and responsibility to discuss and manage what masculinity means in our culture. If masculinity ‘means’ (for some people) using drugs and sex and violence to ‘get back’ at others for abuse or to manage psychological inadequacies, then all men can take a constructive part in establishing different ideals of masculinity, rather than for eg accepting a culture that likes to fantasise about some of these things as, for eg, porn or fantasy or wish fulfilment of whatever. None of that is to blame us for what others who share our gender / sex are doing, it is to say we can take responsibility for being a solution to it. Otherwise, sitting on our hands risks another kind of power game — one of apathetic passivity.
There is a slightly lazy male rhetoric that expects women to take responsibility for telling men how to be better men, and for avoiding / managing the ‘bad’ men, whilst many men retain relative freedom of action and are anxious to defend their freedom from blame in the eyes of society.
I just do not think it is helpful or correct to say that men all men have been complicit in violence against women.
That would be like me saying all straight people have been complicit about homophobic hate crimes. How many straight people have sat back whilst hearing someone refer to something as being “so gay” or heard a gay joke and yet have let the remark go unchallenged, does that make them all complicit and responsible for all the horrific violence and murders committed against the LGBQT community? Of course not.
Or how about all the Islamic terrorist attacks? Are all Muslims complicit unless they have used their social media to publicly condemn the attacks? Of course not, and if I or anyone suggested such a thing we would rightly come under a strong rebuke.
I think we need to look deeper as to what is going on in society, especially in relation to violent and sexual crimes.
Despite the introduction of same sex marriages and equal rights when it comes to adoption etc, despite the fact that more and more main stream media and tv shows and the likes of Netflix have a wide range of gay characters, has homophobic hate crime reduced? NO it is actually on the increase, so what is going on here?
Domestic Violence is on the increase,
Women committing violent crime is on the increase and is now up to 46% of all crimes committed by women, So what is happening?
I look at the kind of shows that our younger generation are subjected to and seem to thrive on and sadly for too many, seem to aspire too, the likes of Jordie Shore that encourages a culture of binge drinking and violence even amongst the female members of cast.
I look at the drink and drug culture in the UK today that has got far worse over the years, but then I also look at the lack of opportunities and inequality faced by many
I think many of us have also been distressed to see an alarming rate of change in attitudes of too many people through this covid pandemic, we seem to have developed a me, me, me culture with very little concern for others, from stripping shelves bare in supermarkets without consideration for others to a total disregard of covid rules.
Something has changed as it really is not a world I recognise from my younger days and I am only 45, so Crickey what it must look like to people in their 70’s and 80s…..
Our police officers and front line health workers are coming under increasing levels of violence on a daily basis, most cases never even make it to court and even the ones that do, more often than not they are let off with far to lighter sentencing.
The truth of the matter is, we are far too lenient on violent and sexual crimes in this country and there are a wide range of societal issues underlying the rise in these crimes.
To simply blame it on men being complicit is not going to achieve anything to address the issues facing the country or the increases in violent and sexual crimes, be they committed against women or men or committed by either
I don’t read the article by MAddy as saying complicity is the whole of the problem. I certainly don’t think she is saying – as you are now putting words into her mouth – that male complicity is the underlying problem to all violence in society. As I read her, she is saying that an acknowledgement of a degree of male complicity – and with it a commitment from more men, to proactively collaborate in a societal solution beyond acts of simple indvidualsim – is a serious step forward in finding a solution to male violence and the fear of male violence, particularly sexual violence. Whilst she is speaking from the standpoint of a woman (obviously) — quite obviously this can be applied to male-on-male violence and sexual violence too. On this score I tend to the belief, by the way, that organisations in the party who campaign for less restrictions on porn and BDSM – for eg – are not helping, and playing into the problem they would probably want to solve, but that’s another can of worms I probably shouldn’t open right now. But nowhere do I find that Maddy says the buck stops with men in toto and only men can solve the problem on their own, and individual men must feel collective guilt and blame for attacks on women. She IS saying that men need to consider their part in a collective culture that has enabled risk of and fear of violence and freedom to make threats by men to be normative.
I was a civil servant in Prison Service HQ which was then part of the Home Office. My immediate superior officer was an experienced female officer and the head of the department was female. We dealt with life sentence prisoners, mainly convicted murderers and others sentenced to life at the discretion of judges. In retirement I am aware of the low proportion of convicted rapists highlighted at PMQ today.
The alleged rape was strongly supported by the police who thought that a conviction was likely because of forensic evidence, he had tied his wife’s sister to a chair with adhesive tape. He apparently resented what she had said to his wife about him, so, of course, the offence had not occurred during his imprisonment. He was probably a life licensee, but his original offence could have been arson, or attempted murder, or other lifer offences, not necessarily murder. During the trial he seemed to become mentally ill, which was accepted by the court, to my chagrin.
I did ask what happens if/when he recovers from his mental illness? Nobody knew. Maybe he had found a loophole? It sounds rather gory to say he would be “sectioned”, which is slang for the section in the Mental Health Act which applied.
If this loophole still exists maybe this government would like to close it while there is a relevant bill before the the Commons.