With autumn conference (taking place in Bournemouth from 20-23 September) approaching, I’ve been looking back and thinking about what I might’ve found useful to know as a first timer. The directory was full, I knew nothing and I wanted to do everything. It took a few goes before I got the hang of it. In this article, I’ve not attempted to explain the exact definition of a fringe event or the correct procedure for a reference back (there are other guides to these things). Instead, I’ve considered the “survival” aspect as it pertains to the neurodivergent community and, at the end, given some guidance on what you can afford to miss.

Look after your basics and prepare in advance

Before you get there, you will (probably) need to book accommodation. As well as cost, consider:

• Distance from venue (especially if you’re likely to need to go back during the day)
• Facilities (do you need to be able to make a packed lunch? Then a fridge is very useful)

Once you get to Bournemouth, consider how you will deal with various needs before they arise. Especially those that might be more complex for you. As soon as you get to the BIC, find:

• The toilets
• A few options for quiet corners you can hide in if you get overwhelmed
• The exits (in case the quiet corners don’t work)
• Stairs (this isn’t for everyone, but I find running up stairs is good for sensory regulation. Most conference centers have more than one staircase so if I need lots of stairs I can do loops)
• A lunch option that works for you. If there isn’t one in the building, leave and find a shop BEFORE lunch time

I would recommend also doing this for the Marriott, the Conference Hotel.

Plan your meals

For me, food is the hardest need to meet at conference. Many people say you can save money by choosing lunchtime fringes that provide catering. I don’t do that, and am not recommending you do it for several reasons:

1. The directory only tells you a session has catering. There is no distinction made between “full sandwich buffet” and “we have tea, coffee & squash”
2. It’s common for fringes to fill up, or to close the door to new people at the start. If the catering doesn’t work for you (because it’s not actual food, or because you don’t like it) you can’t join something else in that timeslot.
3. Some of the most interesting fringes I’ve been to were run by groups who frankly couldn’t afford catering

I recommend bringing your lunch with you. Either make a packed lunch in your accommodation or acquire a supermarket meal deal on your way in. if possible, aim for something that will still be somewhat appetising when you’re full of adrenaline. I also find I function better if I manage to meet a certain nutritional minimum. At this point, I should probably add a disclaimer. Thus, 

This article contains information which, in my view, would be useful to new conference attendees. It is not intended as commentary on long term attendees who spend 3 days subsisting on sweets pilfered from the exhibition hall and then end up broken.

And, if we’re all happily disclaimered, we can continue. I can’t really advise based on your personal needs, but I hope by describing mine you might have a better chance of identifying and strategising your own.

• Appetite – if I get stressed, I don’t feel hungry. I manage this by having a lunch box. I fill it, and I eat what’s in it whether I want it or not. Portion control works both ways
• Textures – sometimes, under stress, my brain will decide certain food textures are disgusting. I manage this by making my packed lunch a series of mono-textured snacks, rather than a more conventional sandwich. That way, each bite is one thing (no surprises) and if one of the things is Bad And Wrong I can eat around it
• Nutrition – as mentioned above, I function better if I meet a certain nutritional minimum. This is “at least 1 protein and at least 1 plant substance”. Due to my occasional texture issues, I like to have backups of each in case something in the lunchbox is a nope on the day.

…so, putting it all together, what does my packed lunch look like? Well, I have a bento style lunch box with 3 sections. The biggest section is about 50%, then 25% for each of the smaller sections. The biggest section is fresh fruit & veg (generally 1 fruit & 2-3 types of veg sticks), then one of the smaller sections is crackers and meat or cheese (this is the first protein source – it’s easiest to pick something that’s ready to eat) and the last one is nuts (a backup protein source, in case the meat/cheese is wrong), dried fruit and usually something sweet.

What to skip 

You can’t do everything at a busy Conference, so how do you choose? Well….

Auditorium stuff – this is all filmed and put online. You only need to go if you are actively participating. That means voting or giving a speech. I personally will not do the rally because it is loud. Go to debates relevant to your interests, maybe go to watch some speeches, skip the rest.

Training – when I went to my first conference, I attended several training sessions that seemed to be on important, worthy subjects that I knew nothing about. Do not do this. Only go to training that is likely to be relevant to you in the next 6 months to a year. The training on public speaking had value to me (it’s a useful thing to most humans), the various things on legal compliance etc. were not.

Fringes – morning to early evening panel discussions are an opportunity to learn something about an area of policy. If it sounds interesting and you’re alert and ready to learn, go. If either of those things is a no, don’t bother. “receptions” are “people in a room, doing small talk with drinks”. I do not thrive in unstructured social spaces, and so I do not go to them. Anything mid-late evening is just for fun, so filter the description through your personal definition of “fun” and decide accordingly.

Exhibition hall – maybe worth a look around. Quietest first thing in the morning or during the most popular auditorium events (leaders speech, rally, controversial motion debates), but with the downside that some stalls will not be open (because the stallholders also want to be in bed or the auditorium)

* Jude Parker is a Lib Dem member based in London.