Author Archives: Tom Reeve

Spread it out: the liberal case for a wealth tax

We are at a crossroads.

Trust in politics is low, and people are right to feel let down. The economy works beautifully for those at the top and barely at all for everyone else. Across the West, that frustration is being picked up by people who offer someone to blame rather than something to fix.

Liberals can offer something better. It’s in our DNA, but sometimes we get confused about what liberalism is and fail to make the case.

So let’s say it plainly. Liberalism has one founding fight, and we have fought it in every century – the fight against power piled up in too few hands. We took on kings. We took on the established church. We broke up monopolies and old boys’ networks. Wherever power gathered in a small group, liberals were the ones who said: spread it out.

Now look at where power is gathering today.

Since 1989, the wealth of the 200 richest families in Britain has grown from £42 billion to £711 billion. Over the very same years, the public wealth of the country fell from a positive £337 billion to minus £1 trillion. Their fortunes grew more than three times as fast as the economy as a whole. That is not a story about clever people doing well. It is a story about power collecting in fewer and fewer hands while the rest of the country goes backwards. A liberal who shrugs at that has forgotten what liberalism is.

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Meet the Overtons

Two-thirds of the British public believe that ordinary working people do not get their fair share of the nation’s wealth. That figure has risen ten percentage points since 2019. Trust in government is at record lows. Dissatisfaction with the NHS, with social care, with housing, with the basic functioning of the state, is at or near levels never previously recorded in four decades of the British Social Attitudes survey.

And yet support for more welfare spending has fallen to its lowest point since the survey began. Read those two facts together. The public is not saying the system is fine. It is saying the fixes on offer do not work. People have lost faith not in the idea of fairness but in the instruments that are supposed to deliver it. They are ready for a different argument. They are waiting for someone to say: the economy is a human-made system, and we can remake it.

So where are the Liberal Democrats?

I would like to introduce you to the Overtons. You will know them. They are in every policy working group, every conference fringe, every strategy call. They are the people who hear a proposal for genuine economic reform and say “that’s outside the Overton window” as if they have ended the argument rather than ducked it. They treat the boundaries of current political acceptability as load-bearing walls, when in fact they are furniture, and we are allowed to move them.

The Overtons are not bad people. They think they are being strategic. They think they are protecting the party from looking extreme. But they are reading the room they were in ten years ago. The public has moved. The Overtons have not noticed.

You can see where the energy is going. Reform UK is growing because it tells people the system is broken and someone is to blame. The Greens are growing because they tell people the system is broken and it can be rebuilt. Both of these parties, from opposite directions, are saying something the Liberal Democrats will not say: that the current economic settlement is a choice, not a fact of nature, and different choices are available.

The Overtons will tell you this is dangerous territory. They have three favourite objections. The first is that the economy is too complex to redesign, which is another way of saying we should leave it to the people who designed the current version. The second is that any serious challenge to market orthodoxy is socialism, and socialism does not work, as if the only two options are the status quo and the Soviet Union. 

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Building Lib Dem groups that work for all members

The last few years have been extraordinary for Liberal Democrats in local government. We have taken control of councils we hadn’t held in a generation, broken Conservative dominance in places that looked permanent, and built a base of councillors larger than at any point in recent memory. The May 2024 general election was the visible peak, but the local story has been running longer and deeper.

Now comes the harder part. Winning is one thing. Running things well, year after year, in a way that makes residents glad they voted for us and councillors proud of what they’ve built, takes more.

I’ve been thinking about this from a particular angle: how we work together when we deliver. The culture inside a Liberal Democrat council group shapes everything that comes out of it, and we don’t talk about it enough.

The group is the engine

Most of what residents see is the leader, the cabinet or portfolio holders, and the policies. Most of what makes those things possible is invisible. The group meetings, the WhatsApp threads, the corridor conversations, the informal conventions about who gets heard and who doesn’t. A council group is a working community of dozens of people, often with very different backgrounds, who have to make collective decisions under pressure for four years at a stretch.

Every group has good weeks and bad weeks, and the difference shows in how the administration operates. When the group is working well, messaging holds together, scrutiny is sharper, and people bring problems to the room rather than nursing them quietly. When it isn’t, the administration carries the cost.

What a liberal group culture looks like

We are Liberal Democrats. Our values should describe how we treat each other, not just sit in a manifesto.

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Our health system is cutting healthy life expectancy. Why isn’t everyone furious?

The Health Foundation published a report yesterday that should stop all Lib Dems in our tracks.

Healthy life expectancy in the UK has fallen by over two years over the past decade. The average person can now expect to live in good health only until they are just under 61. We are ranked 20th out of 21 comparable wealthy nations. Only the United States is worse. In more than nine out of ten areas of the country, people cannot expect to be healthy enough to work until the state pension age of 66 or 67. In one in ten areas, …

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Why does cautious Starmer keep getting it wrong?

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Yesterday, Keir Starmer faced Parliament to explain how a man who failed his security vetting ended up as Britain’s most important ambassador. It is a question worth asking. But there is a deeper one beneath it: how does a prime minister who presents himself as the cautious, process-respecting antidote to Conservative chaos keep finding himself in exactly these situations?

The Mandelson affair is, in miniature, the story of this government. A political decision was taken — to appoint a Labour grandee to a high-profile role. Warnings existed. Red flags had been raised. The vetting process that was supposed to filter out exactly these problems produced a recommendation to deny clearance. And yet the appointment went ahead, with civil servants apparently acting on the understanding that the prime minister wanted it to happen. When it collapsed, spectacularly, Starmer said he was furious he hadn’t been told. The civil servant who overrode the vetting was sacked. The prime minister, once again, was the victim of events – or was he?

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Three chords and the truth

The new Fabian pamphlet, Common Endeavour, has one of the sharpest lines written about populism this year. In chapter 8, Labour MP Liam Byrne borrows the old country music saying that all you need is “three chords and the truth.” Populism works, he argues, because it plays three simple emotional chords: patriotism, nostalgia, and moral combat. Pride, loss, fight. Simple, repeatable, and perfectly tuned to social media algorithms that reward feeling over thought.

He’s right. And he’s honest enough to admit that mainstream politicians have been answering with word salads while populists holler a battle cry. Reform UK doesn’t win arguments. It wins feelings.

But Byrne’s own answer is where it falls short. His formula for beating populism is “optimism plus fairness plus performance.” That’s a strategy memo, not a song. It tells a government what to do. It doesn’t tell a movement what to feel. You can’t knock on a door and sing optimism plus fairness plus performance.

Liberals need our own three chords. Here are mine.

Power. Security. Respect.

Start with power, because that’s where liberals are different. Labour’s instinct is to fix things for people from the centre. Reform’s trick is to offer the feeling of power by handing it to a strongman. One is paternalism. The other is surrender dressed in a flag.

As countless leaders of radical movements have noted, power is not given, it is taken. I believe that’s not only a radical proposition, it’s liberal as well. 

The preamble to our party’s constitution states that power belongs at the lowest level that works. The implication is that the centre must justify each power it possesses, not the other way around.

Yes, the consequences of this are significant at the local level – neighbourhood budgets and planning decisions made by people who live with the outcome. But power isn’t only a local question. 

As a species, we are wealthier than at any point in history, but the people in the bottom half of the economy aren’t feeling it. That’s not a local problem; it’s a national and global failure of power. Who sets wages, who controls housing costs, who decides where investment goes, who writes the rules of the economy, and for whose benefit? 

Liberals may have cracked the local argument. The national one – dispersing economic power, not just political power – is harder. But it matters, and we haven’t begun to answer it seriously.

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Fly me to the moon – reflections on the overview effect  

There is a moment, presumably, just before the engines ignite, when even the most committed astronaut thinks: what on earth am I doing? But then, if they take a moment to look out of the portal at what is happening on the surface of this ball of rock and water we call home – well, who can fault them for wanting to get as far away as possible?

Four astronauts left Earth yesterday, climbing aboard what is, in engineering terms, a controlled explosion and trusting it to hurl them away from the planet at speeds no living thing was designed to tolerate. You could call it brave or foolish. But consider the alternative. They could have stayed. They could have watched the climate data worsen quarter by quarter while the machinery of international response grinds and stalls. They could have followed the wars – the missiles falling on Ukrainian cities, the devastation in Gaza, death and destruction in Iran, chaos in the Straits of Hormuz and more – and felt that familiar mixture of horror and helplessness. They could have watched democracy, that fragile and still-young experiment, being stress-tested by autocrats in countries big and small.

Strapped to a rocket for a journey further from Earth than any human has ever gone before, suddenly, looks sensible.

I imagine that what they will find up there is not escape. Not safety. Something closer to its opposite.

From orbit, Earth looks like a thought someone had and then left out in the dark. A thin blue film stretched over rock and water, suspended in a universe that is almost entirely lethal. No atmosphere. No liquid water. No margin for error. The cosmos does not negotiate, does not hold summits, does not issue statements of concern. It simply is – vast, indifferent, and hostile to everything we are made of.

Astronauts who have seen this tend to describe the same thing. Not relief at the distance, but a kind of vertigo at the stakes. The overview effect, as it has come to be known, is the sudden, visceral understanding that borders are invisible from up there, that conflicts look like nothing against the curvature of a planet, and that the arguments consuming us – which party, which nation, which version of the future – are being conducted on a single, fragile, irreplaceable rock.

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Exclusive: Lib Dems to ditch yellow – and party name – in secret rebrand 

The Liberal Democrats are planning to abandon the iconic yellow colour scheme in favour of mauve, following a review by a boutique consultancy to “help the party live its best life”. 

The party is also thinking of changing its name to something more “on trend”. A spokesperson denied rumours that the party was suffering a midlife crisis. 

A slide deck, marked “Secret – but we’ll have to tell them eventually”, recommends a phased transition to a “trust-forward colour ecosystem”.

“Yellow, in stakeholder sentiment analysis, was described by participants as ‘loud,’ ‘a bit much,’ and ‘like being shouted at by a lemon’,” the report states. “Net Promoter Score for yellow among C2 swing voters in target marginals: minus 14. Recommendation: discontinue.”

It identifies a “colour equity gap” between the party’s current visual identity and its desired positioning as a “calm, competent alternative in a fragmented political landscape”. 

A slide headed “Emotional Resonance Mapping,” states: “Mauve occupies a unique position in the colour spectrum. Neither red nor blue, it simultaneously gestures toward both.” A footnote on the slide adds: “In a fragmented political landscape, this ambiguity is not a weakness. It is the brand.” 

Focus group participants described mauve as “quite pleasant”, “inoffensive” and “the colour of my nan’s bathroom”. The report notes: “These are strong trust indicators.”

The document recommends a three-phase transition: digital and social assets first, then print and physical materials, and ‌what the report calls “the lived clothing experience of members”, which it concedes “may require sensitive change management support”.

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The Greens copied our playbook. We shouldn’t copy theirs.

Labour’s old coalition was always a coalition of convenience. On one side: socially conservative, economically anxious working-class voters, whose politics were shaped by trade unions, community, and a deep suspicion of those at the top. On the other: socially progressive, increasingly comfortable metropolitans, whose politics were shaped by universities, public service, and a belief that social liberalism was self-evidently correct.

These two groups shared little except a common enemy: the Conservative Party. That enemy is gone, at least for now. And without it, the coalition is falling apart.

Lib Dem CEO Mike Dixon sent members a thoughtful analysis of what happened in the Gorton and Denton by-election and what it means for us long-term. He said tactical voting was more fluid and more decisive than at any election in living memory, and we are better placed than any other party to receive anti-Reform tactical votes across a wide range of seats.

He concludes that the only barrier to success at the next election is our scale on the ground. Build the teams, recruit the candidates, deliver the leaflets, and the opportunity is ours, he says.

I agree on the value of a good ground game, but I fear that is only half the answer.

Ground operations matter enormously, but they are generally designed to motivate our supporters and those who are prepared to lend us their votes to go to the polls. They do not create supporters from nothing. What creates them is a clear, consistent national message about what voting Lib Dem will actually get you. 

In the coming political melee, we need to be clear whose side we are on. That means policies that are worthy of the emotional punch our campaigns can deliver.

The Greens show what happens when you get this wrong. Their politics rest on a false premise: that environmental seriousness requires slower growth, higher costs, and less development. Growth versus nature as a zero-sum game. It sounds principled. It is actually a counsel of despair – and in the middle of a housing crisis, it falls hardest on the people who need the new homes.

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When billionaires self-combust 

You’ve got to admire Sir Jim Ratcliffe. It takes a certain kind of genius to build a bonfire out of football tribalism, Brexit politics, tax avoidance, right-wing dog whistles and historical colonial sensitivity, set fire to it and then throw yourself on top. As self-immolative performance art goes, it is unbeatable.

The Manchester United co-owner managed to offend almost everyone this week by declaring that Britain has been “colonised by immigrants”. Not “immigration has risen” or “we need border controls” or any of the hundred ways you can open a debate on migration policy without sounding like you’re auditioning for Reform UK. No, he reached for “colonised” – the one word guaranteed to make historians wince, former British colonies seethe, and Man United’s Muslim Supporters Club issue a statement questioning your basic decency.

The Monaco resident – Sir Jim moved there in 2020, saving himself an estimated £4 billion in tax – also found time to claim Britain’s population had risen from 58 million in 2020 to 70 million now. The actual figure was 67 million in 2020. But why let the Office for National Statistics ruin a good rant?

This is the same Sir Jim who wants UK taxpayer money for his stadium project. The same Sir Jim whose football club employs players from a multitude of nationalities and whose fanbase spans the globe. The same Sir Jim whose club’s success was built by Cristiano Ronaldo, Eric Cantona, and generations of immigrants who apparently “colonised” Old Trafford into 13 Premier League titles.

Even the masterful wordsmith Kelvin MacKenzie couldn’t save him. The former Sun editor gamely tried, pointing out that Ratcliffe has “paid more tax than his critics combined” – which would be more persuasive if Ratcliffe still lived somewhere with income tax. 

Admiring Kelvin’s masterful display of cognitive dissonance, Duncan Bannatyne declared “I’m in”, before launching into a diatribe about billionaires in Monaco being different from boat arrivals because they’ve “paid into the system”. A bold claim about someone whose entire Monaco strategy was specifically designed to stop paying into the system. On Dragons’ Den, that would get you five outs and a clip on YouTube titled ‘Worst Pitch Ever’. Even Kelvin must have been wishing Duncan were a silent partner. 

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Europe knows Trump’s game. Because Europe invented it.

Donald Trump came to Europe expecting to dominate it. Instead, he was sent away with a flea in his ear.

Like many people watching this drama unfold, I was preparing myself for the worst. A new generation of gunboat diplomacy, the dissolution of Nato and the fracturing of the rules-based order. 

However, the row over Greenland tells us something important about the world we are now living in – something to give us hope. Trump arrived armed with threats, tariffs and performative bluster, assuming that European countries could be picked off one by one. He assumed that pressure would fracture solidarity, that intimidation would produce concessions, and Europe would blink.

It didn’t. Europe closed ranks.

What Trump discovered is that Europe recognised his playbook because it has lived it, refined it, and ultimately abandoned it.

Europe invented coercive power politics. For centuries, European states built empires through a ruthless blend of military force, trade pressure, legal fictions and strategic intimidation. They perfected the art of getting what they wanted without always firing a shot. They learned how to extract concessions, how to divide opponents, how to cloak power in respectability.

Europe knows exactly how coercion works because it once ruled much of the world through it.

But Europe also learned something else, the hard way. When empires collapse and there are no weaker territories left to dominate, coercion between peers does not produce stability. It produces catastrophe.

Twice in the twentieth century, European states tore themselves apart in wars of unprecedented scale. Those wars were not accidents. They were the logical endpoint of unrestrained power politics between economically, militarily and organisationally comparable nations. By 1945, the lesson was unavoidable. Among equals, intimidation does not deliver lasting advantage. It delivers ruin.

That is why post-war Europe rebuilt itself on alliances, law and economic interdependence. Not out of sentimentality, but out of survival. Institutions were not designed to express virtue – they are the bedrock of the bloc. They were designed to prevent a return to the world that had nearly destroyed the continent.

This is the context that Trump, who has an instinctive hatred for strong institutions, misread in respect of Greenland.

When he threatened tariffs to force European acquiescence, he expected compliance. Instead, European leaders treated the threat as what it was: an attempt at coercive bargaining. They responded collectively, legally and calmly. The result was telling. The tariffs were shelved. Sovereignty was upheld. Trump was left claiming a vague “framework” and a promise to talk, more or less the outcome he would have achieved had he asked nicely in the first place… and with far less damage to his own credibility.

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A call for radical honesty in our political messaging 

We often say we care about lived experience, and that is true. We talk clearly about housing, childcare and benefits. In some areas, we have led the way with strong examples and practical policies. Liberal Democrat councils are building new council homes. We pushed to end the two-child benefit cap. In government, we raised the personal tax allowance, the last significant rise before it was frozen.

But when it comes to the economy, our message still stops short of what many people want to hear. And this hurts us when campaigning, especially against the Greens and Reform who are prepared to shout out that the system is broken. 

The problem is not that voters lack detail. It is that mainstream politics often lacks honesty, and sometimes it lacks listening.

Politicians talk about growth, markets, interest rates and public finances. These things matter. But, too often, we talk about them as if they exist in a separate world from everyday life. For many people, especially those on low and modest incomes, the economy is not a forecast or a chart. It is whether they have enough money to make choices. That’s why I have previously called for the OBR to publish an analysis of the impact of the Budget on poor people.

We need radical honesty. And that starts by putting on the big ears. 

That means listening properly to what people are telling us, even when it makes us uncomfortable. Especially when it makes us uncomfortable.

On the doorstep, many people now lean towards Reform. Too often, the political response is to assume bad motives. To hear racism where there may instead be frustration, insecurity or anger at a system that feels stacked against them. That instinct is not just unfair. It is politically lazy.

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Threshold freezes are a stealth tax on the poor

The Chancellor hopes no one notices. Voters are starting to realise.

There is no getting around it. The NHS and social care need more money – this is the lion’s share of the budget and is where the government is experiencing the greatest growth pressure. Every serious analysis from the IFS, the OBR and the Health Foundation says that demand, staffing pressures and rising clinical complexity make extra funding unavoidable. If we want a system that works, the state will need to raise more revenue.

The question is not whether we need to pay more. The question is how.

The government’s preferred method is to freeze income tax thresholds for year after year, pushing more of people’s wages into taxation without ever having to announce an explicit rise in basic or higher-rate tax. It sounds painless. Nothing changes on the payslip. No parliamentary vote. No headlines. But it is one of the least fair ways possible to raise revenue and it hits ordinary workers far harder than the wealthy.

The Institute for Fiscal Studies has been unusually blunt about this. Their latest analysis of threshold freezes states that the impact is equivalent to raising all income tax rates by 3.5% by 2029. The Chancellor hopes no one notices that she did this, but people are starting to realise because their real living standards are not improving and the tax take continues to rise.

The numbers are stark, according to figures from the IFS. In 2021, around 59% of adults paid basic rate income tax. By 2029, that will be 72%. In 2021, 8% of adults paid higher-rate tax. By 2029, that will more than double to 17%. These are not people suddenly earning more in real terms. They are people whose wages are simply keeping pace with inflation while frozen thresholds quietly shift them into higher bands.

The Chancellor has also found another way to push people into paying more tax. By increasing the minimum wage faster than the personal allowance, she guarantees that even part-time workers are drawn into paying income tax for the first time. The IFS calculates that if the freeze is extended again, a full-time minimum wage worker will pay £137 more per year in tax compared with current policy, and £759 more than if thresholds had risen as normal. 

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Stand up for poor people: the Chancellor’s Budget must not make things worse

As the Chancellor prepares to deliver the Budget tomorrow, those with the most to lose are the poorest in our society.

Many of you reading this can hardly imagine living on £20,000 a year before housing costs, yet that is the reality for millions. It is roughly 60% of the median income, the level officially defined as “poor.” While the cost-of-living crisis hurts everyone, it hits low-income households hardest. Food, rent and fuel now swallow almost all their disposable income. Far from helping, the government has made life harder.

About 14 million people – one in five – live in relative poverty after housing costs. That includes 4.3 million children, 8.1 million working-age adults and nearly two million pensioners. The Institute for Fiscal Studies reports that child poverty has risen from 27% in 2010-11 to 30% in 2022-23. More than two-thirds of poor children live in households where at least one adult works. Poverty is no longer confined to those out of work; it has become an everyday feature of low-wage Britain.

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Forget the culture wars – economics is the battlefield

I share the concerns of friends in the party about the rise of racism, nationalism and xenophobia in our increasingly illiberal world. The so-called “war on woke” is just code for prejudice against everything diverse, personal and self-expressive.

But as much as I fear we are heading down an all-too-familiar road towards fascism, I don’t believe the progressive response to the far right in this country is working. Too often we react with condemnation — important though that is — without tackling the economic conditions that allow prejudice to thrive in the first place.

Intolerance feeds on economic inequality and financial insecurity. It is always present, but its rise as the dominant malignancy in the political ecosystem often coincides with periods of economic stress. 

The parallels with the 1930s are stark. Then, economic collapse created fertile ground for fascism, with the gutter press fanning the flames. Today, we feel the economy crumbling around us, which once again is generating anxiety and anger, and it’s the social media algorithms that are fanning the flames. Technology may change, but people remain the same.

The cost-of-living crisis is not new. It has been building for decades, leaving many communities hollowed out and resentful. Brexit, nationalism, anti-refugee protests, and Islamophobia have all been symptoms of that deeper malaise, cynically exploited by those who weaponise social discord.

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Beating Reform will require a new economic settlement for the working class 

Reform is on the rise. Led by the garrulous Farage, it is hoovering up votes across the country by doing one simple thing: articulating the grievances of the working classes. 

While it is generally recognised that populism rarely leads to stable government, there is a growing realisation that Reform has a point. It’s not easy, but if we look beyond their abhorrent views on race, religion and equality, they are articulating an economic critique. 

Okay, characterising it as a ‘critique’ is a bit of a stretch – it lacks intellectual rigour or depth – but Farage’s economic cri de coeur resonates with the working classes because it speaks to their lived experience. 

Reform can make the running on this because they are the only ones singing the song. 

Although GDP in Western countries has grown hugely since the 1990s, median wages have remained largely static. That’s the kind of dry economic statistic that is almost guaranteed to put half your audience to sleep while inciting the other half to argue vehemently over its causes. However, the reality of what that means is clear to see. The rich have got richer – much richer – while the poor squeak by. 

We shouldn’t be surprised to see that this leads to political unrest, but some people try to dismiss this as the politics of envy. After all, the reasoning goes, many people may be poor in relative terms, but in absolute terms, they are much richer than previous generations. So what are they complaining about? 

We also live in an unprecedented era of social mobility, in which numerous people have ascended the economic ladder, with some of them becoming fabulously wealthy. It’s self-evident, is it not, that people who don’t get ahead only have themselves to blame. 

Where the politics of envy narrative fails is in ignoring a fundamental facet of human nature, the sense of fairness. Fairness is intrinsic to human psychology – it even appears to be inherent to the psychology of other social animals such as wolves and other animals. We ignore this primal instinct at our peril. 

Is it fair that some people can afford to own several nice homes when many others cannot afford to own even one basic one? If the purpose of an economy is to allocate resources to the members of society, is it fair that some people spend lavishly on luxuries while many others watch every penny? Can we say that we live in a fair society when the poorest among us struggle to put food on the table for their families, or – that awful phrase – have to choose between eating and heating? 

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Like a broken clock, even JD Vance can be right sometimes 

JD Vance’s critique of the liberal consensus at the Munich Security Conference touches on an uncomfortable truth: the liberal project, while achieving peace and prosperity on a global scale, has left many working-class communities behind. Economically, politically, and culturally, these groups feel abandoned, leading to resentment and distrust of the ideals that have propelled progress.

For decades, the liberal elite has prioritised building a brave new world, but in doing so, it neglected to build consensus with the people it sought to serve. Programmes designed to alleviate poverty or reduce inequality often came across as top-down mandates rather than collaborative efforts. While well-intentioned, they failed to engage the communities most affected, leaving many with the impression that they were receiving “handouts” rather than opportunities for self-sufficiency.

Many of the measures introduced – whether to address poverty, climate change, or inequality – stemmed from noble intentions and represented the best instincts of humanity. Yet they were often implemented without meaningful consultation with the electorate. 

The liberal tradition, at its best, is about empowerment. It is about giving individuals the tools to build their own futures, fostering both economic and personal dignity. Yet many of the programmes introduced in the name of progress – however noble – were perceived as undermining the very dignity they sought to preserve. 

For instance, work is more than a pay cheque; it is a source of status, respect, and identity. Lack of meaningful work has left people feeling invisible and devalued. And most people, in my experience, support diversity and equality, but the programmes to support these goals rings hollow for the the people who feel sidelined in their own community. 

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The rise of the poli-bots

With Hollywood actors and writers striking over AI, and many of our favourite TV shows and movies consigned to the cutting room shelf for now, I wanted to draw your attention, dear reader, to the truly serious implications of this – the role of AI in politics.

For those of you who have not been keeping up on the latest scientific literature, this was all foreseen by the writer Michael Crichton in Westworld, his searing firsthand account of how robots replaced cowboys in the American west. Yes, it’s been going on for years, but as long as it was only cowboys, no one cared.

Now AI has come for the creatives who previously had the monopoly on smiling, crying and running away from rampaging dinosaurs, and it’s potentially worse for the politicians who, hitherto, were the only ones capable of delivering their trademark smile, wave and a soundbite.

For these oppressed Hollywood wage slaves, forced to struggle on a mere $20 million per movie, it was enough to drive them out of their e-Limousines and onto the picket line. What will it take to make politicians follow them?

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Reality barges into Small Boats Week

As commemorative weeks go, it’s been a bad one for Rishi Sunak and Suella Braverman. They waited all year for Small Boats Week only to have it spoiled by Leftie Lawyers, so-called fire safety ‘experts’ and an outbreak of lethal bacteria. 

On top of that, they suddenly had half the country shouting at them about human rights, compassion and other foreign ideas after six people drowned in the Channel. 

Never mind that they had done what their base wanted and blocked safe passages for refugees, given the French state-of-the-art kit to harass the migrants and even bought the immigrants a yacht. 

Ok, not exactly a yacht but close enough, right? They spent £1.6bn and then, inexplicably, no one wanted to move into their Barge of Death. 

You have to feel for them – no one had ever organised a Small Boats Week before, so they were in uncharted waters. Even if they’d had a map, how could they be expected to know what ‘Danger – Rocks’ meant, let alone ‘Danger – Moral and Ethical Hazard’? 

You may accuse them of setting sail without, a skipper, a rudder or even a destination, but what you have to understand about the Tories is that their approach to disaster planning is quite literal. 

Whether you are talking about the Asylum Crisis, the Sewage Crisis, the Housing Crisis, the Cost of Living Crisis or the Climate Crisis, the government knows that failing to plan is the first step in winging it. It gives ministers, backbenchers and tabloid hacks free rein to make up policy on the hoof – what could possibly go wrong? 

You may fret that a backlog of 175,000 asylum cases, costing the government £6m a day in temporary accommodation fees, is a sure-fire indication that something has gone wrong with their immigration policy, but the government knows it’s money well spent. 

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The battle hum of the internal combustion engine

The ballots are in, the votes have been tallied, and the defining issue of the next General Election has been determined by 495 voters in Uxbridge & South Ruislip.

Is it the Cost of Living, the NHS or the imminent breakdown of the global climate system? No. To paraphrase Clinton’s campaign strategist, James Carville (drum roll please): “It’s the automobile, stupid.”
Tories and Labour alike have rushed to endorse the new zeitgeist, the Tories because it distracts voters from those issues that really matter and Labour because they are timid and always let the Tories set the agenda.

As issues go for the …

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Elon Musk shows Lib Dems the way

Elon Musk, in his finite wisdom, is axing the Twitter bird logo in favour of the letter X. This follows his recent decision to rebadge the company as X Corp. 

‘What’s this got to do with me?’ I hear you say. ‘I’m a Lib Dem and I’ve got leaflets to deliver.’ Yes, you do have leaflets to deliver, but stay with me – this could be a golden opportunity for the Lib Dems, but only if we have the courage to seize it.

In the infinite reaches of his multidimensional consciousness, Musk has realised the truth about birds: they’re boring. (In fact, they probably don’t even exist )

It’s visionary stuff, right? I mean, what do birds do for us, apart from inspire us with their majestic soaring and melodious tunes? Birds may be the descendants of the dinosaurs and have colonised every continent on Earth including Antarctica, but can they make a cheese sandwich or send a Tweet? No, they opted for beautiful plumage rather than hands – that was their choice, now they have to live with it. 

So, he’s going to axe the blue bird of acrimony and replace it with – surprise, surprise – an X.  As letters go, there are so many reasons to use X. It’s a structurally sound letter, it’s associated with mystery, it’s the 24th letter in the alphabet. Pirates use it on maps, mathematicians use it in equations, and Musk names all his bloomin’ companies after it. 

Posted in Op-eds | Tagged , , , and | 8 Comments
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